Him: Hey old man.
Me: Hey kiddo. How's it going?
Him: Pretty good. Do they have pancakes here?
Me: I don't know, look at the menu. Breakfast is on me.
Him: You sure?
Me: Yeah, my treat.
Him: Thanks. Waitress, I'll have one of everything!
Me: Very funny. So how's life? You just started high school, right?
Him: It's good. Yeah, 9th grade. Most of my friends from Middle School are in at least some of my classes. I'm pretty nervous but I think I'll be ok.
Me: You'll be fine. You're kind. The right people will see that and respect you.
Him: What if everybody thinks I'm a loser?
Me: If I could offer you only one piece of advice, and don't worry I'll be giving you many more pieces, it would be to stop worrying about what other people think about you. The sooner you get to a place where you're confident in your own skin, the better off you'll be.
Him: You make it sound so easy.
Me: It took me a long time, but I figured telling you now was worth a shot.
Him: Are you just going to lecture me or are we going to order some pancakes?
Me: Let's order. I need coffee. You just started drinking coffee right?
Him: Yeah I've been drinking some of the coffee Dad makes.
Me: Well trust me, it only gets better from there. Yes I'll have the stack of pancakes with bacon on the side, and a large coffee with cream. No sugar. Thank you.
Him: I'll have the French toast and a large coffee with cream and sugar. Thank you.
Me: I thought you wanted pancakes.
Him: I changed my mind. The picture looks good. So you keep asking me how it's going, but how are you? Is my future so bright I have to wear shades?
Me: Please don't wear sunglasses indoors. Your future, at least where I am, is good. Often great. You'll learn to lower your expectations for life. It makes you less likely to be disappointed and you'll be able to appreciate the little things more.
Him: Wow, don't oversell it.
Me: Look I'm just trying to be realistic. Life is not a fairy tale. Love is not a fairy tale. You'll have some tough years.
Him: Yeah but I'll have a lot of fun too, right?
Me: You'll have a ton of fun! Oh, another piece of advice: Turns out you have a terrible memory. Buy a cheap camera and take pictures. Write in a journal. You'll thank me later. I'll thank you later? I don't know. You'll be glad when you can remember more than just fuzzy details.
Him: Got it. I am interested in photography. Speaking of interests, are you still interested in music? Are we in a band?
Me: What's with this "we" stuff? I don't think that's how this works. Anyway, yes we are more interested in music than ever before. It's a huge part of our...my life. I'm not in a band. It turns out I'm not all that talented at actually making music, I just really love listening to it, sharing it, and talking about it. But maybe if you practice guitar a lot more, that'll change.
Him: I only have that hand me down guitar from Dad.
Me: Yeah but you don't need anything fancy. Even when you get a nice guitar as a graduation present, don't get rid of that hand me down. Hang on to it.
Him: It sounds like you let a lot of things go that you should have kept. Do you, do I, do we not care about anything?
Me: No, we care. We care a lot, we just tend to live in the moment and we think we'll remember things forever. But like I said before we have a shit memory so maybe keep a few more things.
Him: French toast! Oh wow your pancakes look really good.
Me: Did you change your mind again?
Him: Well now that I see them in person I remember how badly I wanted pancakes.
Me: Would you like to switch?
Him: Really? You sure?
Me: It's fine. I do the same for my kids.
Him: You have kids?
Me: Yeah they're awesome. They've been through some stuff but they have good hearts. They're smart. Not just book smart, but emotionally intelligent.
Him: Like are they therapists or something?
Me: No but they live their lives with empathy, which I like to think has a lot to do with my teachings and my personality rubbing off on them.
Him: Wow, you have a big ego huh?
Me: No not at all, but you'll learn to be proud of the things you're good at, especially when it comes to raising good people in this world.
Him: The world seems fine.
Me: To you. I envy your limited knowledge of the world. It gets really crazy out there later. You'll feel powerless. Just remember to be kind and open-minded. Surround yourself with kind and empathetic people.
Him: You're scaring me.
Me: It's not like that. Things are generally never as bad as, or as good as, your imagination. Just focus on yourself, your family, and core friends and you'll be fine.
Him: These pancakes are so good. Can I have your extra syrup?
Me: Damn, would you like some pancakes with your syrup?
Him: You sound like Dad.
Me: That's not a bad thing.
Him: If you say so.
Me: Listen to him. He may not be college educated, but he's a great guy. He'll do anything for you. Mom too. So many sacrifices.
Him: They get on my nerves, but they're good parents.
Me: Later you'll be wishing they were around more to get on your nerves.
Him: This coffee sucks.
Me: How can it be any worse than Dad's Folgers?
Him: I don't know. I think it's better because he made it.
Me: The smell of it reminds me of him.
Him: Wait did he die?!
Me: No you idiot, I just don't live with him anymore and don't see them as much as I should.
Him: Oh good. I don't even want to think about them dying.
Me: I don't either but I don't really have a choice
Him: ...
Me: Stay close to your brothers.
Him: Did one of them die?!
Me: No one died yet. Thankfully.
Him: You sound so serious.
Me: Sorry. I guess this feels like a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Him: Is It though? Can't you just think back and reminisce about all the things you did right and wrong?
Me: Does this not change your future?
Him: I don't know how this works but I doubt it.
Me: Well you know what? I'm going to take that as a piece of advice from you. To not be so serious. To have more fun, despite things being historically difficult and stressful.
Him: You got that from what I said?
Me: Yeah we think more in our future.
Him: All I can think about is pancakes and the new Bush album.
Me: That tracks. Finish your coffee and pancakes and let's get out of here. I have a lot of stuff to do.
Him: That must suck.